When sexual thoughts happen use the following puritan skills to think pure again:

1.  Breathe rapidly till you pass out

2.  Engage in deep philosophy

3.  Join a science fiction book club

4.  Watch sponge Bob

5.  Get some expert spiritual advise from a hipster

6.  Get a George W fan poster to stare at

7.  Jump up and down

8.  Stick your head in a refrigerator

9.  Become competitive at bingo

10.  Pick someone's nose

If none of these work try becoming all ten!