Put on your skeptical nerd Helmet as I say this:

The yellow glass cylinder in my house, lit the way it is, with the stalk of a plastic plant running through it:

Is at a level ten wow level.  I can't see reality the same way now.  Looking at it makes me unsure of reality.

Promise.

Hey! Give that lady some space. She needs it. She's an astronaut.


Okay, this glass cylinder is not appearing correctly at night in my lighting around it. This is really odd.

A photo might come, or not.

Science guy wanted, or science gal!

I am puzzled by an object and need an answer or I may start to feel nuts.

The person who wants to cause you suffering while chewing apart your brain is probably not a trusted friend or Ally.

Socialize wisely! 💀

Really big question: What does cool mean in September, as in hip, with it, or hella smoking epic as fuck.

Mmmm..

Maybe I should start with another question so losers like me can understand myself.  Or you can just google it!

Setting: Inside a dark, echoing bathroom plumbing line, right before a major flushing event.Urine: (Splashing aggressively against the ceramic walls) Look at you, slacking off as usual! I’m in and out of here six times a day, keeping this body filtered and clean. You show up once—maybe twice if the human had a fiber bar—and expect a standing ovation. You're slow, you're heavy, and you take forever to get ready!Poop: (Thudding heavily into the water, sending up a massive splash) Slow? It’s called craftsmanship, you watery amateur! You’re just 95% water and a little bit of leftover urea. You require zero effort. I am the grand finale of a 24-hour digestive masterpiece! I represent the steak, the potatoes, the complex carbohydrates! I have structure. I have presence.Urine: Presence? You mean odor! You completely ruin the atmosphere the second you walk into the room. People have to light matches and turn on exhaust fans just to survive your presence. When I arrive, it’s a quick, polite zip and a wash of the hands. I am civilized.Poop: Oh, don't act so pure. You turn bright neon yellow if the human takes a single multivitamin! And let's talk about urgency—you make the human panic and run like a maniac just because a movie ran over two hours. I have discipline. I give a polite, rumbling warning hours in advance.Urine: (Steaming slightly) I am the frontline defense of the kidneys! Without me, the system shuts down from toxic buildup in days. You're just the stuff the body couldn't even use. You're literally the leftovers!Poop: Leftovers? I am the ultimate metric of gut health! Doctors study my shape, my color, and my consistency on a chart like it's fine art. No one is out here making a "Bristol Stool Chart" for your boring splash patterns.The Toilet Handle: (CLANK)Urine: (Swirling rapidly in circles) Uh oh. Here comes the swirl!Poop: (Sinking into the vortex) See you in the septic tank, water-boy!