I hope this helps save lives by moving vaccines faster and keeping masks on.

 


Research shows that midgets are often if not always chosen as best men, which explains why I will never get married!


 

To trek or not to trek? That is the question!


 

Why us?


 

News Flash! Politicians and those around them have suddenly been hit with rare sweaty rash on both face and butt cheeks, more information to come as our story developes. So far everone is sitting in their chairs, sometimes standing, and pretending this is all a hoax. You just don't understand the seriousness of the situation, and even they themselves maybe entirely clueless.

Bill Hole knew everything there is to know about the moon including his moon sign which was in Cancer.


 

Humans love money, but they also love Control and have known to be controlling giving rise to totally controlled human beings!

 





Star Karaoke Song!


 

It is easy to think of the past as Glory days, but really our memory isn't that incredible and amazing. Boldly let us go forwards!

 



 

We talk in person.


 

Unfortunately there is a such thing as a reactionary intellectual!

 




Not all intellectuals are, because they can fear this symbol: ?

 


Setting: Inside a dark, echoing bathroom plumbing line, right before a major flushing event.Urine: (Splashing aggressively against the ceramic walls) Look at you, slacking off as usual! I’m in and out of here six times a day, keeping this body filtered and clean. You show up once—maybe twice if the human had a fiber bar—and expect a standing ovation. You're slow, you're heavy, and you take forever to get ready!Poop: (Thudding heavily into the water, sending up a massive splash) Slow? It’s called craftsmanship, you watery amateur! You’re just 95% water and a little bit of leftover urea. You require zero effort. I am the grand finale of a 24-hour digestive masterpiece! I represent the steak, the potatoes, the complex carbohydrates! I have structure. I have presence.Urine: Presence? You mean odor! You completely ruin the atmosphere the second you walk into the room. People have to light matches and turn on exhaust fans just to survive your presence. When I arrive, it’s a quick, polite zip and a wash of the hands. I am civilized.Poop: Oh, don't act so pure. You turn bright neon yellow if the human takes a single multivitamin! And let's talk about urgency—you make the human panic and run like a maniac just because a movie ran over two hours. I have discipline. I give a polite, rumbling warning hours in advance.Urine: (Steaming slightly) I am the frontline defense of the kidneys! Without me, the system shuts down from toxic buildup in days. You're just the stuff the body couldn't even use. You're literally the leftovers!Poop: Leftovers? I am the ultimate metric of gut health! Doctors study my shape, my color, and my consistency on a chart like it's fine art. No one is out here making a "Bristol Stool Chart" for your boring splash patterns.The Toilet Handle: (CLANK)Urine: (Swirling rapidly in circles) Uh oh. Here comes the swirl!Poop: (Sinking into the vortex) See you in the septic tank, water-boy!