If men always create penis shaped buildings, what in God's name will women do next. There is just one place left to go.

People might claim to have figured me out and put me into a box, but I contain multitude universes.

I am more of a man because of my underwear. Call me champion.

At long last she told me she was a convenience store, and I believed her.

Man creates a second forehead for himself as a status booster.

What makes one person stupid can make another person greedy. We need to be tolerant of each other.

She offered me many things, including a UFO experience.

People with extra fat should share some.

And with this book of fiction: I rule!

Butter has never been better. Drop your eggs and buy some today.

If all you do is exist then you are enough.

The life of a fault finder is a long list of faults.

I asked her what she does for a living. She looked at me and said: bouncy.

Falling in love is much like gravity, it tends to go down.

When Wonder Woman is all you have, it's time to getting going.

Hate brand soap isn't selling well.

Men want to be me, women want to eat me alive.

He was handsome, tall, and rich, so she tore all her hair out and sold it.

If a woman cries: help me! save me! Put on your speedo and run away as fast as you can!

At least a cougar is a form of cat.

If my words are more interesting than her boobs then I have really done something.

People who are always hungry probably need to swim more.

You may lose your mind, but not your wallet.

Being a Jew is great, we have the most photographed noses in the world.

If you can't understand what I am doing look deeply within yourself and fight the flying banana.

Without women there would be no tonka trucks.

When you are hard at work, it's an expression, that means that it is easy.

It is with great timing that I entered the common street of copper. And walked through it I came to a gate where a man waited for me. He was much older than myself and in a civil war uniform. He told me to sit down and eat some of his bread and write a poem . This is what it said:

Most of the people who make someone relevant are the people who would turn you into an idiot.

When someone is being too nice it's a strong clue you are being fooled by someone who isn't.

Never throw out creepy people, save them for later.

Nobody is charming and ignorant at the same time.

A textbook is a thing designed to hit you in the head.

One of the symptoms of a creative person is the terrible desire to create.

If we all began as eggs we should try to evolve a bit.

Since she was dead, I couldn't understand why she wanted my body. Perhaps I am that sexy.

Men might shy away from romance, but as a writer it is better not to.

I like to fly, but prefer boats, trains, and my imagination.

She accused me of being a player, and I responded: Yea I do, when I play bingo.

Since we last checked there are no dictators with big dicks. You were lied to.

I found her eyeball on my shoulder, and she said she would have her eye on me, I should have known.

Having great accomplished family members offers no evidence to yourself.

Those who can't get bored with math haven't lived.

You will have real problems when your butt cheeks freeze together.

Being an ape man has its advantages.

Giants rarely have small egos.

Instead of me, she longed for American Cheese.

It isn't nudity that causes people to become pregnant.

Those that make art don't care about anything but the art, but those who only care about themselves within the art are only phonies.

From stop and go, came two nipples, both designed for perfect confusion, and perfect torment.

My first wife was a tweaker, my second wife was her mother, it's all downhill from here.

When in doubt chase rainbows.

If you love me, then you hate yourself.

She never got her man, but she ran off with his tuba.

The strait hormones just opened.

I could handle the love bombs, but not the flamethrower.

Big balls is still waiting for his coconuts.

After she showed me her 1,000 selfies I got a divorce.

Money doesn't pay enough.

She was smarter than a whip, had some whips, and was holding a whip.

The newspaper lit on fire from sparking so much rage.

Never marry, it's a sign of misery, because misery loves company.

Those who fail to eat lots of ice cream are the world's ultimate losers.

She came out of the void and that is why she is gone.

Rebels always learn that their mother was right.

I took out my hose because she was built like a fire engine.

Those penis zombie friends will never wait for you.

You can live a long time and never long for time.

So many books, so few flame throwers.

Weak people are those who stomp on ants.

Drummers are the nicest people.

She thanked my love, for it gave her the best eyes.

If you hit someone a hundred times with the truth they might get it.

Some people make stuff, others destroy stuff. Sounds like we are the universe.

I am glad if you object with me sometimes.

If you want to treat someone like a God make them laugh, otherwise stare at the wall and listen to noise.

The future will end by technology and yet we keep making more.

When will the rock stars, blow up my boulders.

In the jungle I met a snake, and it bit me, because that is what snakes do.

The reason I don't lose at chess is I seldom play it.

Every good joke has a bad thought, but is there to make you think.

I couldn't wait to see it again. But suddenly there she was!

I have more blonde ambition then anyone.

Skip to content Your account Search the website Enter search keywords Light Curiosity engine Events Tours Shop News Features Newsletters Podcasts Video Comment Culture Games | This week's magazine Health Space Physics Technology Environment Mind Humans Life Mathematics Chemistry Earth Society Explore our newsletters Columnist and Space The rise, the fall and the rebound of cyclic cosmology Cyclic cosmology, or the big bounce, is the idea that the universe will eventually crunch back together and then go through another big bang. Columnist Leah Crane finds that, appropriately, it’s coming back By Leah Crane 17 April 2026 The largest 3D map of our universe to date, with Earth at the center and every dot showing a galaxy DESI collaboration and KPNO/NOIRLab/NSF/AURA/R. Proctor The universe is dead; long live the universe. Not right at this moment, not yet. But one day everything we know will be gone. The cities we build, the lakes we swim in, the planet we live on, the solar system we inhabit, the star we orbit and every star we don’t – they’re all headed towards an inescapable finale. Read more A new kind of hidden black hole may explain the mystery of dark energy Advertisement At the end of it all, what happens? Some say our ever-expanding universe will slow down and then one day do a cosmic U-turn, undoing all the growth that has happened since the big bang. Eventually, everything will crunch together into the tiniest possible space and then explode out again in a riot of rebirth – that’s the idea we call cyclic cosmology, or the big bounce. It’s been around for a long time, and the idea itself has faced a trajectory that mirrors its contents. It was briefly popular in the mid-20th century, fell from favour, and now it may be making a comeback thanks to new data from the largest 3D map of the universe ever created, made by the Dark Energy Spectroscopic Instrument (DESI). As is occasionally the case with grand cosmological hypotheses, proponents of cyclic cosmology mostly preferred it for its elegance: if the universe is cyclic, that means we probably don’t have to worry about what precipitated the big bang or what existed before it – those near-impossible questions are already answered. There’s a beautiful sense of symmetry to the whole thing. Catherine Heymans, the Astronomer Royal for Scotland, expressed it nicely during a recent New Scientist subscriber event I hosted, where she said, “It really gels with me that the universe sort of is created in a big bang, it expands, it slows down, gravity pulls it back in on itself, there’s a big crunch, there’s another big bang and it expands… This just makes me very happy.” At the same event, Adam Riess, who won a Nobel for his and his colleagues’ discovery of dark energy, put forward one of the more concrete reasons for many cosmologists’ fondness for the idea. “We like it because it tells us that this is not a special time that we live in or the one-shot universe,” he said. In other words, in a cyclic universe it wouldn’t be quite such an unbelievable coincidence that we’re here at all to ponder these things. Personally, I don’t think the idea that times like this happen over and over again – perhaps not in every bounce but definitely in more than one – with all the right conditions for life and trees and rockets to the moon, makes it that much less special, but I digress. Maybe that’s more of an anthropocentric, emotional position than one based on the laws of physics. Subscriber-only newsletter Sign up to Lost in Space-Time Untangle mind-bending physics, maths and the weirdness of reality with our monthly, special-guest-written newsletter. Sign up to newsletter New Scientist. Science news and long reads from expert journalists, covering developments in science, technology, health and the environment on the website and the magazine. For a long time, cyclic cosmology fell out of favour, driven partly by Riess’s work showing that the universe is expanding at an accelerating rate. If the space between the stars is growing faster and faster, it feels unlikely that it will eventually shrink back down to nothing again. Gravity just isn’t strong enough to counteract dark energy. “Unfortunately, all of the measurements that we make tell us that there just isn’t enough mass in the universe to pull it back together,” said Heymans. “At the moment, the evidence is pointing towards a very cold and sad and empty death for our universe.” This idea, called the heat death, is now the most accepted version of what is to come. There are various other reasons that the big bounce faded into relative obscurity, largely to do with problems that arise when we try to sort out how matter, energy and entropy might be recycled or destroyed in the moment between bounces. The second law of thermodynamics is a sticking point: it says that disorder, or entropy, in a closed system (such as the universe, as far as we know) can never decrease. With an expanding universe, that’s easy to square – we would just see a continual slow increase in entropy over the lifetime of the cosmos. But if the universe starts contracting again, entropy would correspondingly start to decrease. There are ways around this, generally involving pushing the problem off into the next cycle of expansion and contraction. If the universe gets bigger in each cycle, entropy is still increasing overall. But if you extrapolate backwards or forwards in time enough, you end up in the same situation as before. We still start with a big bang at the beginning of the universe and an eventual heat death at the end, it’s just a more complicated, stepwise path between the two. Another way around the entropy problem was popularised in the 2010s by legendary theoretical physicist Roger Penrose, of Penrose triangle fame. His model is called conformal cyclic cosmology, and it would look exactly like an ever-expanding universe… right until the very end. As the universe expands and everything gets further and further from everything else, matter will decay into its composite parts, and eventually everything will just be leftover photons floating in the abyss. That’s not particularly controversial. But what Penrose proposed next is. His idea is that the extreme emptiness and uniformity of space-time at the end of one cycle, or aeon, is the same as the structure we’d expect at the very beginning of a new aeon. The idea behind conformal cyclic cosmology is that thanks to this functionally identical structure (and some very complicated maths), a new, expanding universe can be kicked off from the frigid remains of the previous one. The idea is niche and difficult (bordering on impossible) to test. Penrose has proposed some potentially measurable bits of evidence for it, but on the whole, cosmologists tend to find them unconvincing. However, it hasn’t been disproven either, and the fact that it manages to get around the entropy problem means that it shouldn’t be simply discarded, even if it is widely viewed with scepticism. So, we’re stuck without much of a way to apply these ideas to the real universe we live in. The Mayall 4-meter Telescope at Kitt Peak National Observatory, which is used by DESI to survey the stars DESI Collaboration/DOE/KPNO/NOIR Enter DESI. Its enormous map of the universe has shown that dark energy, which previously looked like it would only grow in strength forever, seems to be weakening. That is, the outward acceleration of the universe appears to be slowing. As Heymans stressed during the event, this does not mean that the universe is coming back together – it’s still accelerating in its expansion, just not quite as quickly. Still, this is a radical shift in our understanding of dark energy, and it could well kick off an era of new theories about the way our cosmos will spend its final days. And among those new theories, cyclic cosmologies seem to be rising once again. “What could be causing dark energy to change could mean that in another 10 billion years’ time, dark energy weakens so much that it does reverse and it does pull everything back in on itself, which would be lovely,” said Heymans. The problem with knowing what it all means is that we don’t understand a massive proportion of the universe. Dark energy makes up nearly 70 per cent of all the matter and energy in the entire cosmos; it controls the ultimate fate of everything, and yet we have no idea what it is or how it works. On cosmological time scales, we just met – Reiss and his colleagues only identified it less than 30 years ago. “Without understanding the nature of the dark energy that’s driving the present acceleration, it’s very difficult to extrapolate it into the future. Will it weaken?” said Riess. “I would say all bets are off about the future.” Smart money may still be on a cold and empty end of the universe, but, for the first time in a century, it might also be worth placing a long-shot wager on the big bounce.

Basically anyone who won't listen doesn't care.

Some insults hide compliments. All are just words.

The best rule of thumb is to use your hands a lot.

I think it is arrogant of the physics department to believe that the universe didn't come from math itself.

I keep praying for something, then pray for pie, and get it in my face.

Just because you say a stupid thing a hundred times doesn't make it true. Correct?

Thanks to her bee hive I've been stung.

Weirdos and Dorks unite and form into soap bubbles and blobs.

Don't hate me for my good looks, hate the dirt upon my shoes.

She told me her butt was better than a TV so I listened.

Thanks to the internet we are becoming less then the internet.

It turned out her brain really was a walnut.

A critic is someone who hates other people's selfies.

I told her I had cheese nuts and that made her happy.

Thanks to my explosive roses I am back in the game and feeling hungry.

Just because I am Jewish and Old doesn't mean I will go into the dustbin of history, but I will make history instead.

Never stop doubting yourself.

Only Iran would not complain about a war against them.

What came first the chicken or the egg? ANSWER: The chicken is currently coming.

I joined the Sylvia Plath school of dance.

She did more than moon me, she hit me with Jupiter.

My dream is to enter every store in the world and to buy everything in the store, because I need to be happy.

After holding me in her arms for a week I finally escaped out the window.

Leg of lamb or legs of hot chic? You decide!

Should weirdos and dorks have the final say? You decide?!

Bloody new wars shampoo and conditioner, for that crimson look.

In the morning I wash my hair, then brain wash my mind, its all good in my life!

She bought me for $100.00, now I am her man, but I am happy, because she is my dog.

Auschwitz Jewish Center Foundation 🎗️ @AuschwitzJCF · Dec 14, 2025 Replying to @MichealMartinTD Condemnations of antisemitic violence ring hollow when detached from accountability. For months, Ireland’s government has relentlessly singled out Israel while failing to meaningfully confront antisemitism at home. Jewish warnings that demonizing the world’s only Jewish state would not remain confined to rhetoric were dismissed. They were right. Antisemitic violence does not arise in a vacuum. It is fueled by narratives that portray Jewish self-defense as criminal, Jewish suffering as conditional, and Jewish identity as collective guilt. When such narratives are normalized by political leaders, they help legitimize the hatred those same leaders later claim to oppose. Expressions of sympathy after attacks are not moral leadership. If Ireland’s leaders genuinely wish to stand against antisemitism, they must confront the consequences of their own words and actions and abandon rhetoric that isolates and delegitimizes Jews through Israel. Anything less is not solidarity. It is hypocrisy.

Antisemitism doesn’t begin with violence. It begins with normalization. Condemning the former while excusing the latter is moral evasion. Antisemitism in America isn’t just imported by a few radicals, it’s been platformed and legitimized by people with power and influence.

Nice people always eat Swiss Cheese and dance.

I tried to warn you, but you wouldn't listen, and then...

When the aliens came they found nothing but mice and pigs.

Us_militryPower @Trumpspoof__ · 43m Parody account Breaking: Strait of Hormuz ; Open ; President Trump has won ! Iran announced a short while ago that the Strait is fully open and ready for full operation . Gas prices are about to drop .

Idiots to experience strange longings and begin moaning in unison.

Desperate for love robot dolls are now ready to go!

A man can not love a woman if he has fallen in love with her cat.

Cemil Kerimoglu 🇩🇪🇺🇦 @cemk_cemil · Apr 15 https://substack.com/home/post/p-194290585 Europe finds itself at a fateful juncture, yet its own decision-making machinery lets a single malicious actor paralyze the whole. In aiming to protect the smaller nations, the unanimity principle was essentially catering to petty nationalism. Eventually, it has become the liberum veto of our time - the same institution that once destroyed the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth and wiped it off the map. Even the very thought itself that small European nations need "protection" against larger ones is flawed and deeply malicious. This new essay argues that abolishing the veto is thus not merely a procedural tweak. It is a philosophical act: the moment Europeans finally choose to see themselves as Europeans, and Europe as more than the sum of its parts. Abolish the veto!

Just because you can steal my cheese doesn't mean you should.

World to abandon all logic and reason, begin to fire guns at random while eating fancy chocolate.

Azad Essa @azadessa · Mar 14 A reminder that our best selling children’s book, ‘From the River to the Sea: A Colouring Book’, has been banned from sale and distribution in France following false accusations of antisemitism from the French Zionist right.

I expect more effort to stop antisemitism, not simply because it should be done, but because of antisemitism, but because it is an alarm bell of all kinds of problems lingering. If world war two meant anything? And laws could be passed and nothing might change, more violence and more hate?

Yes, France took a notable (though ultimately unsuccessful) parliamentary action against antisemitism as recently as yesterday (April 16, 2026).What HappenedFrench lawmakers, led by centrist MP Caroline Yadan (from President Macron's centrist coalition), had prepared the so-called Yadan bill (or PPL Yadan / Bill 575) for debate in the National Assembly on April 16–17, 2026. The bill aimed to combat what its supporters described as "new forms of antisemitism" that have surged since the October 7, 2023, Hamas attacks and the ensuing Israel-Gaza war. france24.com Key proposed measures included:Expanding the offense of "glorification of terrorism" or "incitement to terrorism" to cover implicit justifications. Creating a new offense for publicly calling for the destruction of a state recognized by France (widely seen as targeting slogans like "From the river to the sea" or explicit calls to eliminate Israel). Penalizing excessive trivialization of terrorist acts or comparisons of Israel to the Nazis. Supporters argued this was necessary to address evolving antisemitic rhetoric that existing laws (which already criminalize direct incitement and Holocaust denial) do not fully cover, amid a documented rise in antisemitic incidents in France.The OutcomeAt the last minute on April 16, 2026, the bill's backers withdrew it before the scheduled debate, as it became clear it lacked sufficient votes to pass. This followed:Massive public opposition, including a petition that gathered over 700,000 signatures. Protests and criticism from left-wing parties, UN human rights experts, academics, and free-speech advocates who warned the bill risked conflating legitimate criticism of Israeli government policies with antisemitism, potentially chilling pro-Palestinian speech and activism. en.wikipedia.org The government has indicated it will introduce a revised or similar bill in late June 2026.Broader ContextThis episode occurs against a backdrop of ongoing high levels of antisemitic acts in France (Europe's largest Jewish community). French authorities continue to enforce existing laws through arrests, investigations, and public condemnations. President Macron has also spoken out strongly against antisemitism and called for measures like mandatory electoral bans for officials guilty of it.In short, France's most recent high-profile action was this attempted legislative push, which was halted yesterday due to lack of support—but the issue remains very much alive, with plans for a follow-up bill soon. The debate highlights deep divisions in France over how to balance fighting hate with protecting free expression.