Turns out Hitler was only pretending to be a vegetarian, and secretly he ate lamb shanks.

The total eclipse has created the total abortion law. Nothing can stop us now!

American military in the work out room improving pecs, abs, biceps, glutes, and getting the missles ready.

The people who watched the Movie: "JAWS" Some admit to thinking the movie was called: "JEWS!" Now bad eye sight was the problem, the director is a Jew, yes, true, true. But the film involves a shark that comes out of the screen and eats people in the audience.

I watched her make up and plastic surgery melt in the ozone heat, and she looked like a snake or some kind of reptile. I was interested!

We are under attack by monks from all sides, we are in need of assistance, mayday, sos!

We keep raising the interest rates and people are still bored out of their minds! We need help!

In America we tried making sex an olympic sport and what an epic fail that was. People said it was very very dull to watch, and Americans just didn't understand things.

I am the most popular non person in the world, even the computers, and ai dig me, they dig me!

I collect crabs, I'm crabby, my best friends are hermits, and I have a colony of crabs in my underwear.

I'm giving up on America and heading towards the Isle of Nymphomaniacs. Enjoy the American Experiment and try new drugs.