If your hobbit friends surround you, make sure to close the curtians.

Go space age with your friends and plug yourself into smart teck now!

If you find yourself making out with yourself head to the pharmacy with ideas.

As your romantic adviser I recommend throwing dorritos at random people in your love quest.

Don't hate me because I'm very handsome.

Troll odor can make it through wireless connections.

Hitler was gay and had a small dick.

This year I will get no elite gifts and will be hawpy.

If you are in a bad situation you can either stare at the sun or flash your nipples at your enemies.

Sexy people do amazing things, in and out of bed.