Do I speak to truthfully! So much for that! New down the hatch Truth Mouth Wash to bring back the lying sailor in no time!!!

The criminal emotional support number is there for you! Need your crimes legalized? Presto!

If I need a kick to the head it isn't hard to find, even a kick to the heart, it's free!

I can tell the vomit behind the sugar.

I might be a polymath, but the world prefers dingbats.

An imperfect world trumped by a good home means homebody for me.

I never forget someone who craps in my boots.

The reason people like smart people is that idiots only come in a few flavors, one them being shit.

If you paint over vomit on the street it will still smell.

If something fails mostly and epic fails sometimes the odds were never good.

Greed can fuse with any emotion and will be our downfall unless a miracle happens.